Yo Mama
by AllHailCheesecake
Summary: James, trying to impress Lily, get's on Snape with Yo Mama jokes. OneShot


Don't own Hp or the jokes...ya I made up the jokes -rolls eyes-

Sooo...Review and have fun. Feel free to tell your enemies!

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"Snivellous get away from my girlfriend!" James Potter shouted as Severous Snape was swooning at sixteen year old Lily Evans. 

"James Potter I am not your girlfriend."

"Yeah Potter, get a life!" He put his arm around Lily and that did it.

"You know what Snape? You suck." He said angrily.

"He just mad 'cause his mama's so ugly she put the Boogie man outta business." Then the crowd formed.

"You wana talk about **MY **mother!" James laughed and smirked at Sirius.

"You know what Sniv-Sniv? Yo Mama's so ugly she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt." The crowd ooh'd and some asked who 'Michael Jackson and Brad Pitt' were.

"Yo Mama's so Ugly her middle name was accident." The whole crowd laughed at this one coming from Snape even Lily.

"Yo Mama's so Ugly Tony Blair moved her birthday to Halloween." Said an Infuriated James The Muggle-borns laughed.

"Yo Mama's so stupid when you were born, she looked at your umbilical cord and said, 'Wow, it comes with cable too!'" Severus smiled and said.

"Oh really? Yo Mama's so stupid, she asked for a refund on a jigsaw puzzle complaining it was broken." James smiled watching Snape put that one together.

"Oh right, Yo mama's so stupid I found her peaking over a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The crowd was still laughing from James' this only made them laugh harder.

"Guess what Snapey-Poo, Yo Mama's so stupid she lost her shadow." James fired back, it was lucky that his childhood enemy did this often back at home in the muggle school he used to go to.

"Yo Mama So Stupid I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder..." Snape was laughing at his own joke...kind of sad really.

"Your Mama So Fat when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'..." James shot at him quickly Lily started to laugh softly at that.

"Your Mama So Fat she once went on a seafood diet...whenever she saw food she ate it!" Only the Plure bloods laughed mostly everyone else had heard that one way to many times.

"Your Mama So Fat when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time." James smiled lopsidedly he had no idea where he got that one.

"Your Mama So Fat she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm..." Snape took a deep breath in awaitence for James' reply which was quick.

"Your Mama So Fat she could be the eighth continent."

"Your Mama So Fat she lost a game at Hide&Seek only cos I spotted her...behind Mount Everest." Snape replied to James.

"Look Prongs, I can take over here, you gotta be short of jokes, Your Mama so Fat her belt size is Equator." Sirius said stepping up with a smirk.

"Okay, Sev'? I'll take over. Your Mama So Fat she needs a map to find her butt." Lucius smiled.

"Funny, funny, Your Mama so Fat she fell into the Grand Canyon...and got stuck!" Sirius replied to Lucius.

"Simply hilarious Black, Your Mama's so Fat she wears an asteroid belt."

"Well Your mama's so Fat her Passport photo says 'Picture is continued overleaf'

"You know what Black? Your Mama's so Old, she left her purse on Noah's Ark."

"It's lucky I hate my mom Lucy. Your Mama's so old when she ran the 100 metre dash, they timed her with a sundial."

"I hate your mom too Siri. Yo Moma So Old when I asked for her ID she handed me a rock." Lucius replied to the stupid nickname.

"My dad can do better than that!" Sirius shouted, "Yo Moma So Old the fire department are on standby when you light her birthday cake."

"Yo momma so short she gotta slam-dunk her bus fare!" Said Lucius grinning widly.

"Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!" Sirius replied with a Chesire Cat-like grin.

"Yo momma so short, she models for trophys." Lucius Snapped.

"Yo Momma so short that she has to hold up a sign that says, "Dont Spit! I Cant Swim!" " Sirius smiled. As Lucius stumbled for more but was stuck.

"WE WON! Yelled Sirius and James together.

"WHOOOHOOO!" The Maraurders said together all this caught Lily's eye...she broke up with Snape the next day if that said anything.

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In the present year Harry, in Potions, starts up Yo Mama jokes with Draco.

"Yo mama's so stupid she went out with Snape!" Draco said Smartly.

"Hey! That was her desicion!" Each of the students in the classroom's mouth dropped open.


End file.
